Each year I try to come up with “new” New Year’s resolutions, but most of the time I return to the same ones. Those haunting “life issues” that persist in spite of my best intentions. Two of my finest are: 1) Don’t take things personally; and 2) Don’t make assumptions.
This year, I decided to get ahead by listening to one of my favorite audiobooks about changing these habits, The Four Agreements. In it, Don Miguel Ruiz maps out a detailed plan of how to stop taking things personally and making assumptions. Usually, I listen to these inspirational messages on the way to and from work. It helps strengthen my commitment to change and persistence.
I’ve been doing this for several years and it’s a strategy I think most of us can benefit from. However, here comes the perspiration part. There is no way I (or anyone else) can change our thoughts or actions without choosing different ones. Like Nike says, “Just Do It.” Throughout the day, I have abundant opportunities (as most of us do) to be aware of these thoughts and to challenge my “stinking thinking.”
Last week, I heard from a friend I’d phoned 2 weeks ago forgetting she’d gone out of town. In the meantime, I’d decided that I’d offended her and that’s why she hadn’t called. My #2 “Don’t make assumptions.” Clearly, I haven’t practiced this enough.
I’m committed to my inspiration-perspiration workout for 2012. What are you resolved to change? What inspires/strengthens your resolve? Let us know.
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The Four Agreements is one of my faves too!
so good. personalizing what isn’t about us is a real downer. remembering that emotions and behaviors come from the brain helps when those darn personalizing tendencies come regardless of what we do. keep on.
It’s so easy to think it’s about us when honestly, most of the time, it’s not. This is definitely one of the best life tips I’ve ever learned.
I’m sorry to say any and all plans for the new yearhad to be put on hold when I was bed ridden. I’m not the type of person who enjoys laying around and be waited on. I’m finding it very hard to be “up”
So sorry about what you’re going through. I know how hard it is for me to lay around when I’m sick for a few days. Of course, it’s hard to stay “up”. I think that resolutions can cover all sorts of change, including becoming more accepting of others taking care of us when we’re in need. Truly, tough to do! Let us know if there are ways we can help support you.