Like Stacey, I’m a People magazine fan (what a great escape!) and last night at the grocery I noticed Demi Moore on the cover with the caption she’s “barely eating” because her life’s falling apart. While I hate to see anyone suffer, I did wonder why celebs don’t eat themselves into a stupor when they feel stressed out like the rest of us. At least indulge a little, right?
I used to indulge a lot From my early teens to mid-twenties my weight bobbled up and down 50 lbs. I tried all kinds of diets, including my favorite where I ate a light breakfast, one giant chocolate-covered ice cream cone for lunch and a light dinner. I actually lost weight on it because I enjoyed the ice cream so much.
It wasn’t until midway through graduate school when I stumbled across a book Fat Is A Feminist Issue that I figured out what to do. In it, Susie Orbach discusses how women use weight to deal with relationships with men as well as the conflict over being valued for their brains or bods.
Reflecting on her ideas, I realized that every time I slimmed down, I got more welcome and unwelcome attention from men. Since I wasn’t assertive, it was easier to pile on the pounds than tell them to back off. Also, when I weighed more men took me more seriously and as a women who values being “brainy,” this worked better too.
With the help of Orbach’s book and some soul-searching, I was able to remove the obstacles to maintaining a healthy weight. I learned that if I was clear about who I was inside, the outside could reflect that without hiding behind extra pounds. I could be smart, sexy, strong and assertive. I didn’t have to sacrifice one for the other.
This week think about how your appearance reflects your inner life. What do you need to change on the inside before you change on the outside? What’s getting in your way?