Sex Isn’t Just to Procreate-It’s Important for Self-Care

Let’s face it – summer is hot. This summer is no exception, especially in the Midwest where the temperatures are hotter than the sub-tropics. What better time to talk about sex than when it’s hot?

Sex is hot, just like summer. Well, it can be if you want it to be. Your version of sex doesn’t have to match “those” kinds of movies or involve any fancy moves or technics. Sex is what you want and need it to be. Whether it’s more about intimacy or steamy, sweaty action, sex is part of the self-care continuum.

Are you wondering why I’m stating this to be true? In my opinion, what better way to instill a positive image in oneself than when you’re feeling confident and sexy with your partner? Many of us refuse to see the beauty in ourselves – inside or out. Sex and intimacy and the amount we have – or not — is a direct measure of our self-esteem, confidence and self-caring.

When we care about ourselves, we care about our bodies, our well-being and our ability to please ourselves and our partner. That’s why when we don’t get enough of it, sex becomes a chore when “babymaking,” or it isn’t fulfilling our needs, it can put a crimp in our self-care regimen.

Want my advice? Crank up the air conditioning, grab that partner and have some fun together! Don’t have someone to share sexy times with? There’s nothing wrong with taking care of you. That’s what self-care is all about! Have a safe and sexy summer!

Today’s “sexy” author is Mollee Bauer, founder of pregnancy.org, the premier website for info, advice and support for pregnancy, new moms and early motherhood. To visit, click here.

50 Shades of Grey Mama Style

Did you know that one of the two most common complaints women report to their doctors is low libido? Well, the popularity of the new novel 50 Shades of Grey certainly suggests otherwise. So where’s the disconnect? Check out what Mollee Bauer of pregnancy.org had to say about this.

“It’s not easy feeling sexy in regurgitated breast milk and hair that is matted with mashed bananas (which of course has been strategically placed by your wee one).

Sex and motherhood – is that an oxymoron?

These days, it seems that women aren’t necessarily raised with a sense of entitlement to sexual expression. Moms face antiquated notions that maternity and sexuality shouldn’t even be in the same room. Lots of mothers mention that their desire for sex didn’t go away when they had children. Instead, they insist the desire gets buried under mounds of conflicting demands for their time and attention.

If you ask a mom about her sex life, you’ll most likely hear, “Sex? What’s sex?” It’s a well-known statistic that parents who are living with children (especially younger children) only spend 20 minutes each week being intimate with one another. There are always exceptions but sadly this seems to be the norm.

How does sex and motherhood fit into self-care? Fulfillment in this arena is just as important for your overall self-esteem, not to mention emotional and physical well-being. Like meditation, sex is good for the soul. Just because you’re a mom doesn’t mean you’re dead.

Today’s guest Mollee Bauer, is founder of Pregnancy.org, the premiere online health site which gives moms the tools they need to empower themselves, feel safe and get advice
on how to take care of, pamper, and check-in with themselves. These tools help them conquer their challenges and overcome obstacles to self-care.”

Sex Is Good for Our Brains-Who Knew???

According to a recent article by Dr. Oz, sex has some of the same stress-relieving benefits as exercise. In a recent animal study, they found that daily sexual experiences over two-weeks, reduced the release of cortisol, a major stress hormone, increased the brain’s ability to create and support new brain cells, and decreased anxietylike behavior.

Sound like good news? It would be except many women report losing their interest and desire for sex as they get older, and especially once they become moms. Likewise, negative messages they learned growing up may intensify their lack of libido.

For women, sexual desire derives from emotional as well as physical chemistry. Women want to feel an emotional connection with their partners, and when this is absent as often happens over time especially when raising a family, sexual interest diminishes. Midlife is a time when men and women often turn to affairs to  rekindle the spark they once felt with their original partner. However, once the honeymoon ends with the new partner, sexual desire may fade too.

The solution is that we must nourish our relationships with our current partners like we do our children, friends or anyone we love. Then emotional intimacy kindles desire and physical intimacy kindles an emotional connection. And the added benefit, sex is good for our brains. Who Knew???

I’m writing a new book about hormones, libido/desire and intimacy in women. If you have questions or would like to share your stories, please comment or e-mail realmomexperts@gmail.com.