Tag: new moms

To Reduce Stress-Simply Breathe

Posted on by Dr. Diane Sanford in July Tips, Monday Musings

It’s been a while since we’ve posted but finally life seems to be quieting down (I probably shouldn’t say that too loud) and I’ve missed writing and connecting with each of you. Since opening the Midwest Mind Body Health Center in St. Louis last October, I’ve not had much time to “catch my breath” which is an excellent way to reduce stress and the subject of this post.

By learning to focus our attention on our breath “without judgement” we can help settle our bodies and minds which are often tense and overloaded. The breath offers an opportunity for mindful awareness because it occurs without us having to do anything.  All we have to do is “notice” the sensation of breath as it moves through our body. No more. No less.

If this sounds too good to be true it isn’t. Until I started studying mindfulness a few years ago, I didn’t believe these practices which include “breath awareness” could be so effective in relieving stress and tension but they can. In March there was even an article in the New York Times about mindfulness to reduce stress and worry. Seems everyone is catching the “mindfulness” bug.

To help you get started, here’s a link to the YouTube video I made so the students in my May “Mindful Stress Reduction Class” could practice “Simply Breathe”-http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xWmHn_YMsp8. However, as the NY Times article says, “If you don’t practice, it won’t work.”

So, here’s to your health one breath at a time. Enjoy!

Let There Be Light

Posted on by Dr. Diane Sanford in December Tips, Holiday Sanity, Monday Musings

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I just got off the phone with a good friend of mine, Chris Miles, founder of Global Exercise Group, a company offering a holistic approach to lower back pain, which he’s just launched. I called him because I needed his advice about a situation I’ve encountered where politics has led to good people being harmed. Knowing his business acumen and character, I thought he could help me sort this out. He did.

Chris left the corporate world last year after watching countless examples of good people being sacrificed to corporate politics while others became drones of the status quo. A world I’ve managed to avoid (mostly) by being self-employed for the last 20 years. In listening to him, I realized that unfortunately the situation I find myself in is much like he described.

Chris is one of the “lights” in my life, supporting me in doing the best I can as a business owner and person.  In The Four Agreements, one of my personal favorites, Don Miguel Ruiz’es Fourth Agreement is  “Always do your best,” and I believe as he does that each of us has a responsibility to do so.  What do we do then when we find ourselves in a situation where we are supposed to have the authority to make things better but aren’t allowed to due to politics? The solution I’m arriving at is to invest my energy instead in situations in which I can help create a positive outcome and let go of those I can’t.

Ah, the Serenity Prayer again. “God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change; the courage to change the things I can; and the wisdom to know the difference.”

So, that’s my practice for this week. What about you?

Blessings

Posted on by Dr. Diane Sanford in Monday Musings, November tips

As I sit here listening to absolutely beautiful music play from www.aholyexperience.com, my thoughts turn to Stacey, my dear co-conspirator at livingselfcare, and how she’s doing. I’ve had a rough few weeks myself with becoming acutely ill after a great vacation, but when I read about her taking her mom in, I thought this post needs to be about her and the generosity of spirit she and many of you have.

Knowing that this decision would raise many discomforts for her, she chose it anyway, as women often do. I am always awestruck by such unselfishness and yet many of us dismiss what we’ve done as obligatory or no big deal. But, it’s so much more than that. It’s about being connected to life at a very deep level and knowing that relationships are the greatest wealth of all. What is more important than loving and being loved? This is what makes life worthwhile.

Please extend your blessings to Stacey and all who are in need of comfort and support as they undertake the challenges life presents. When you awake and when you lie down, offer a prayer of healing for them and you. I will, too.

(Stacey-This one’s for you).

Have a Good Day

Posted on by Dr. Diane Sanford in Monday Musings, September tips

Today was a good day. It started this morning after a restful night’s sleep and having a warm, soothing cup of Zen tea. I spent some time online, looking for phones for my new office, did laundry, and watched “Income Property” during my excellent lunch of chicken wild rice soup my husband made. Yum.

Then I ran errands, went by my new office and bribed my sister to join me there with a container of my husband’s soup. She said she’d come by a week ago but hadn’t. It was good to have another set of eyes to look at how we’re finishing the space. We had a good laugh about how OCD we can be over furniture positioning, then went on our way.

(All readers who live in and around Saint Louis, are welcome to drop by my new location, the Midwest Mind Body Health Center at 501 N. Lindbergh on Monday, Tuesday or Thursday from 9-5. Call ahead to make certain we’re in-314-991-5666).

When I got home the sun was shining as I sat on my beautiful front porch sipping my Starbuck’s Pumpkin Latte. Even better, I got to do yoga and meditate outdoors. Finally, my husband Steve and I fixed dinner together and now I’m writing this blog. A fine ending to a good day.

This week, notice what you do that feels good, no matter how small. Remember, most good days are filled with smaller, enjoyable moments. Savoring life’s goodness decreases stress and improves health and well-being.

Enjoy your week!

Web Therapy: New Options for New Moms

Posted on by Dr. Diane Sanford in September tips, Thursday "Words of Wisdom"

If any of you have seen Web Therapy starring Lisa Kudrow on Showtime, then you know that this type of interaction is possible (though we hope no counselor is as awful as Kudrow’s character). Therapy is indeed coming into the 21st Century, with resources available to folks that may have had none before.

Regroup Therapy is one such example of how resources are reaching out to new moms instead of them having to research, coordinate and get to a therapist’s office. Regroup offers both group and individual sessions from the comfort of your own home or office. Each group and session is led by a licensed mental health professional with extensive training in the field of perinatal mood disorders. Clients just need a computer with a web cam, a microphone and head phones or earbuds, which most modern machines come equipped with.

This service is useful in many situations. Folks who live far away from any resources, moms who may be just too depressed to get to an appointment, new moms who want a group experience where no groups are available, and even moms who like the less personal interaction with a therapist on the computer screen can all benefit from Regroup’s services.

I am proud to be a part of Regroup, and ask that you spread the word to anyone who may benefit from a service like this. Please take a look at our website and stay tuned for exciting new things to come! Therapy can be a very vital part of self-care, and with Regroup, it can be much easier, too!

 

Regroup: We Bring the Support to You

This Too Shall Pass

Posted on by Dr. Diane Sanford in Monday Musings, September tips

Reading Stacey’s post last week, reminded me that life is full of joy and sorrow, loss and gain. These shifts occur in a day, week, months or years. How do we keep going? Here’s what I decided to do.

Monday I discovered my colleagues leaving the practice I started and will be maintaining, sent marketing info out which prompted a nurse from one of the groups I work closely with to call and ask if Women’s Healthcare Partnership (my practice) was breaking up. I was worried and distressed. But, I had a cancellation the next hour so I phoned the group’s office manager to tell her Women’s Healthcare Partnership was not breaking up and arranged for them to visit my new location. I felt relieved. The same day, I got home to discover these colleagues had sent an e-mail with both their pictures on it after one of them told me she didn’t know anything about it. I felt angry and upset. However, Wednesday I signed my new lease and can finally move ahead with my plans to open the Midwest Mind Body Health Center on Oct. 1. Yeah!

How did I cope? I reminded myself of the story of King Solomon’s ring. As the story goes, King Solomon heard of a magical ring that had the power to make happy people sad, and sad people happy so he sent his minister out to find it. He was about to abandon the search when he came across a wise jeweler who said he’d heard of such a ring and would make him one. Taking a plain gold band he engraved four words in it. When the ring was delivered, King Solomon recognized the simple wisdom it contained, for engraved in the band were the words, “This too shall pass.”

Life is constantly changing. This is the hard and promising truth. Light becomes dark and dark turns to light in a single day.  Next time you face adversity, stress or just unpleasant feelings,  remember “This too shall pass.”

When A Mother Kills-How We Can Prevent This

Posted on by Dr. Diane Sanford in August Tips, Monday Musings

Last Monday, the unthinkable occurred in the idyllic, picture perfect community just 10 minutes from my home. A mom who was known to have struggled with depression but seemed to be “doing okay,” shot her children and then killed herself. A week later, it’s become clear that a severe mental illness led to their deaths.

Could this and other tragedies like the recent movie theater shootings have been prevented? I think so. Because of the stigma associated with mental health conditions like depression, anxiety and bi-polar disorder, people are afraid seek help for fear of being labeled “crazy.” Instead, they try to “mask” their distress by appearing “normal,” which doesn’t work. Likewise, they frequently don’t continue with counseling until they’re well or stay on their medicines because they don’t want to admit the full extent of their illness.

Truth is that each of us is vulnerable to depression, anxiety, OCD or bi-polar disorder depending on what runs in our family and that under the right conditions/stressors, we’ll experience a clinical episode. But, we believe that nothing as bad as the above tragedies will happen because we’ll be able to stop it. Tragically, when you have a severe mental illness and your brain isn’t working right, terrible things can happen to anyone. Mental illness doesn’t discriminate.

What can we do to prevent such bad outcomes? First, we must let go of any stigma we have about mental illness. Next, acknowledge that depression, anxiety, OCD and bi-polar disorder can affect anyone, including us.

Click here for video- Understanding Mental Issues for Mothers

Know our family’s mental health history and seek help immediately if we start feeling bad and it’s not letting up. An ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure, and the most we’ll be out is our time and co-pay if we discover you don’t need help. Make certain our loved ones do the same. Insist they follow their health provider’s recommendations until they’re fully recovered and without symptoms for a minimum of six months.

We can make a difference for ourselves and our loved ones. Let’s start today.

How Our Children Teach Us to Surrender

Posted on by Dr. Diane Sanford in July Tips, Monday Musings

One of my most challenging life lessons has been surrender-letting go of what I want to have happen and allowing life to unfold naturally. Sound familiar? I imagine it is. Why is this so hard to do? Because we’re convinced that if we “let go” bad things or at least random things will happen, that will be bad for us. But if we hang on really tight, then we can produce the desired outcome. Right?

What often happens though is that we produce the effect we wanted to avoid. Take our children for example, the more we struggle to make them like us, the more they fight to be themselves. I am not talking about teaching them to be kind, respectful and compassionate. Of course, we want to do everything we can to instill these values. What I mean is trying to control who they become like who they choose as friends or the interests they pursue.

Here’s what Kahlil Gibran had to say “On Children”

“Your children are not your children, They are the sons and daughters of Life’s longing for itself.

They come through you but not from you, And though they are with you, yet they belong not to you.

You may give them your love but not your thoughts, For they have their own thoughts.

You may house their bodies but not their souls, For their souls dwell in the house of tomorrow, which you cannot visit, not even in your dreams.

You may strive to be like them, but seek not to make them like you. For life goes not backward nor tarries with yesterday.”

This week, look deeply into your child’s eyes and ask “Who are you? Who are you becoming?” Then listen with your intuition. If you don’t have children, look into your own eyes in the mirror and ask the same questions. Finally, release whatever comes to mind and let the universe fill in the details. Ah, the sweet taste of surrender.

Enjoy!

Sex and Creativity: The Power of the Second Chakra

Posted on by Dr. Diane Sanford in July Tips, Monday Musings

As you know, I recently spent a week at “Seduction of Spirit,” a signature workshop given by Deepak Chopra and his talented Chopra Center instructors. While there, we studied the seven “chakras” or energy centers in our body. Today, I want to pass on what I learned about our second chakra-the seat of our sexual energy and creativity-physical, mental, emotional and spiritual.

Second chakra energy is critical to he evolution of consciousness which depends on sexual union and procreation but also our union with universal consciousness which you may call God, Jesus Christ, Buddha or your higher power. What this means is that by expressing yourself creatively in your own unique way through the arts and who you, you enable life to change for the better. If this sounds a little “woo woo,” keep listening because when you are in harmony with the “cosmic dance,” life is an endless, creative pursuit which flows effortlessly.

Here’s what Patanjali, the author of Yoga Sutras had to say in the first to third century B.C.

“When you inspired by some great purpose, some extraordinary project, all your thoughts break their bounds;

Your mind transcends limitations, your consciousness expands in every direction, and you find yourself in a new great and wonderful world;

Dormant forces, faculties, and talents come alive, and your discover yourself to be a greater person by far than you ever dreamed yourself to be.”

This week express second chakra energy by connecting with your authentic self through pleasure and joy, physically, emotionally, and spirituality. Abandon yourself to the cosmic dance. Let the energy of the universe flow through you free and unbounded.

Enjoy!

50 Shades of Grey Mama Style

Posted on by Dr. Diane Sanford in June Tips, Thursday "Words of Wisdom"

Did you know that one of the two most common complaints women report to their doctors is low libido? Well, the popularity of the new novel 50 Shades of Grey certainly suggests otherwise. So where’s the disconnect? Check out what Mollee Bauer of pregnancy.org had to say about this.

“It’s not easy feeling sexy in regurgitated breast milk and hair that is matted with mashed bananas (which of course has been strategically placed by your wee one).

Sex and motherhood – is that an oxymoron?

These days, it seems that women aren’t necessarily raised with a sense of entitlement to sexual expression. Moms face antiquated notions that maternity and sexuality shouldn’t even be in the same room. Lots of mothers mention that their desire for sex didn’t go away when they had children. Instead, they insist the desire gets buried under mounds of conflicting demands for their time and attention.

If you ask a mom about her sex life, you’ll most likely hear, “Sex? What’s sex?” It’s a well-known statistic that parents who are living with children (especially younger children) only spend 20 minutes each week being intimate with one another. There are always exceptions but sadly this seems to be the norm.

How does sex and motherhood fit into self-care? Fulfillment in this arena is just as important for your overall self-esteem, not to mention emotional and physical well-being. Like meditation, sex is good for the soul. Just because you’re a mom doesn’t mean you’re dead.

Today’s guest Mollee Bauer, is founder of Pregnancy.org, the premiere online health site which gives moms the tools they need to empower themselves, feel safe and get advice
on how to take care of, pamper, and check-in with themselves. These tools help them conquer their challenges and overcome obstacles to self-care.”