Category: May Tips

Self-Care Challenge Day 2: The Mind-Body Connection

Posted on by Dr. Diane Sanford in May Tips, Monday Musings

As we like to say at livingselfcare.com, “Self-Care is like chocolate. You can never have enough.” During this week’s self-care challenge we’ll bring you daily tips and inspiration with a chance to win prizes that pamper. Click here to learn more.

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Welcome to The Self-Care Challenge, Day 2! These guest entries focus on the mind/body connection reminding us that what goes on in our minds has a significant impact on our bodies, whether we are aware of it or not!

Our first self-care tip was written by my (Stacey’s) mother, Nancy Lawrence. I cherish the talks we have, as she always has wise words of advice for me – when I ask for it! My mom has never pushed her ideas or advice on me, and I have always been grateful for her giving me the space I need to make mistakes and then helping me learn from them. Here’s her entry:

The difference between a thoughtful word and a thoughtless word is the difference between a lightning bug and a lightning strike. One word or phrase can uplift or beat down. Take the word “failure” for example. If you hear this word and it pertains to you, in that moment you have to make a choice.

Failure doesn’t exist, really. It’s always a lesson on what won’t work and the opportunity to alter your thinking to find out what does work. After all, we’d have no light bulbs if Edison had thrown in the towel! In the brief seconds after hearing a thoughtless word, the choice is yours: hang your head and feel awful; or find the lesson or the “silver lining.” There always is one!

Our second self-care tip is from Sue Suardi, a friend of Diane’s. If you ever find yourself talking yourself out of going to the gym (or running or skipping yoga class…), come back here and read Sue’s wonderful tip:

My friends and co-workers ask me why after a long day of work I bother working out.  I do it for myself.  I believe working out is not only healthy for me but also a release of the stress from the day.  Working out is not a chore for me but a gift to myself.  Sweating is a sweet release!

What great advice for our minds and our bodies! Stay tuned for more tips during our Self-Care Challenge Week!

Self-Care Starts with You-Let the Challenge Begin!

Posted on by Dr. Diane Sanford in May Tips, Monday Musings

As we like to say at livingselfcare.com, “Self-Care is like chocolate. You can never have enough.” During this week’s self-care challenge we’ll bring you daily tips and inspiration with a chance to win prizes that pamper. Click here to learn more.

The tip I’ve chosen to talk about from our Top Ten Tips Plus Two is #6-“Accept yourself and others wholly.” To love one’s self unconditionally, both strengths and limitations, may be one of the biggest challenges most of us face. Without self-acceptance, it’s impossible to feel secure, peaceful and accepting of others.

Exercise: Five Minutes for Yourself (from Life Will Never Be the Same: The Real Mom’s Postpartum Survival Guide):

Try to remember a day in your life when you felt happy, peaceful, and self-confident. It doesn’t matter if the memory is recent or from long ago. If you don’t have an actual memory to draw on, imagine what a day like this would look like. Are there people around or are you alone? Are you at the beach, in an office, on stage, snuggled in bed? Picture as vividly as possible the details of your surroundings. Use all five senses—identify sounds, smells, tastes, textures, and colors. Now pay attention to what your body feels like on this wonderful day. What is your breathing like? Can you feel your heartbeat? Are your shoulders relaxed? Can you feel your happiness clear to the tips of your fingers?

Now take a mental snapshot of this scene. You can return here whenever you need to take a break, whenever you need to feel refreshed and renewed. It only takes a few minutes. You only have to close your eyes and look at the snapshot again. It will all come flooding back to you: the sounds, colors, tastes, textures, and smells; the feelings of happiness, peace, and self-confidence radiating out into each part of your body. No one can take this away from you. It’s yours to keep and to draw on whenever you are in need.

Practice accepting your unique, wonderful self all week long. Remember, “progress not perfection” is the goal.

Self-Care Challenge Starts Monday

Posted on by Dr. Diane Sanford in May Tips

Are you ready to live self-care? We hope so and our May 21-25 self-care challenge/contest will provide you with the tools and encouragement you need to get started or keep going if you’ve already begun.

Each May and October, we at livingselfcare.com offer a week long contest/challenge to help you make self-care part of your life. For our May 21-25 2012 challenge, we are asking you to take a look at Diane’s List of Ten Plus Two and choose a technique that you either already use or would like to try out. Then write a brief paragraph letting us know what you did and how it worked for you and email it to Stacey. Your submission qualifies you for our prize giveaway which includes a massage envy gift certificate, pedicure kit, Amazon gift certificate and more.

Our Challenge is not a competition. Instead, it is designed to encourage and support women as they move themselves to the top of their lists in order to support themselves as well as they do others.

We will also be tweeting and posting about how we’re doing personally with practicing our favorite self-care tips during  the challenge/contest at  www.twitter.com/realmomexperts and on Facebook at http://www.facebook.com/livingselfcare. Remember, progress, not perfection, is the goal!

The Impossibility of Loneliness

Posted on by Dr. Diane Sanford in May Tips, Thursday "Words of Wisdom"

National Womens' Health Week

As we’re heading toward the end of National Women’s Health Week, we hope you have taken some time out for your physical, mental, emotional and spiritual needs. We hope you also learned something about what your needs are and how you can help yourself every day live a more stress-free life!

One of the coping techniques that have been backed up with plenty of research is that friends are essential for reducing stress. But what happens if you are disabled and can’t get out of the house…or live way out in rural country…or find it very difficult to make friends? I’m sure we could list many more situations that could interfere with one’s social life. Just over a decade ago, folks had to settle with loneliness or had to come up with very creative ways to interact with others. Today, in the age of instant information, as long as you have a way to get on-line, you have a way to make friends!

Around the turn of the century, as the Internet was becoming more and more popular, random people started writing weblogs – or blogs, for short. The author(s) could write whenever he or she wanted to (Can’t sleep? Write a tirade about Ugandan sweatshops at 2am!), as often as he or she wanted to. But that was just the beginning of what blogs would become. Soon after, free sites like blogger.com and WordPress introduced “search” features that would let the user find other blogs that related to them in geographical proximity, interests, and musical preferences, for example. It became almost impossible to be lonely!

For the most part, technology has been beneficial. It has streamlined everyday living and has made accessible things we never thought would be. But, as anyone who has waited in a line while “our computers are down,” will agree – it is far from perfect. Yet, as I think of my real friends – folks that I have come to know and enjoy – I am proud to include a few names of people that I have never met, at least not in person…yet.

Battling the Bulge While Embracing Equilibrium

Posted on by Dr. Diane Sanford in May Tips

We all have our battle scars when it comes to our bodies and losing weight. I’m living proof of someone who often turned herself into a guinea pig – all in the name of getting healthy…and possibly finding balance.

“Hi, my name is Mollee and I’ve struggled with my weight for over 15 years. I am a self-admitted foodie who historically has had a hedonistic relationship with food.” While saying that “out loud” doesn’t magically make the pounds disappear, acknowledgment and transparency does at some point.

Frustrated at having tried just about everything, I came across a picture of my friend and she looked fabulous. I immediately contacted her and said, “Hey, you look amazing. What are you doing?” Turns out she took HCG drops. This controversial lifestyle changer has some people thinking it’s worse than Darth Vader, and others proclaiming their lives transformed because of it. I’m in the later camp.

I did my exhaustive research and decided that the only thing I had to lose were my bulges. I went by the book, didn’t cheat, made sure I had plenty of protein, vitamins and vegetables and by the end of my first round, 45 days later, I was 27 pounds lighter, with 28 inches melted off my body.  It sounds too good to be true, doesn’t it?

I became acutely aware of how much I was overeating, and learned how to make more intelligent food and lifestyle choices. I am enjoying being more aware of how my body works, too. But it’s not all about me.

What I want you to walk away with is the fact that if you put your mind to what you want, be it a project, mission, way of doing something, you are 100 percent capable of doing so. The only thing getting in the way is you. If you’re committed to yourself, change happens.

I found and embraced my equilibrium, will you?

Today’s author is Mollee Bauer, founder of pregnancy.org and one of next week’s challenge champions. Join us May 21-25 as we challenge and support each other to make self-care part of our daily lives.

Time Magazine Asks Moms to Judge If We’re “Mom Enough”?

Posted on by Dr. Diane Sanford in May Tips, Monday Musings

Shame on them. Isn’t there enough competition among moms already? First, it was the debate over whether we could work outside of our homes and still care well for our children or if we needed to stay home for our children to thrive . With 70% of moms currently working outside of our homes to contribute to our families’ financial support, I guess they had to find something new for us to judge ourselves and each other about.

So, they picked how we parent, implying that only the toughest and most determined moms/parents could succeed at attachment parenting. The goal of attachment parenting is to create a secure bond between mom and baby through breastfeeding on demand, co-sleeping and baby-wearing (keeping babies close to moms in a sling, on her lap while working, etc.) While parents are not encouraged to neglect their needs for sleep, nourishment, restorative activities-foundational self-care skills, it seems likely.

More important, the goal of all successful parenting is to create a secure bond between parent and child, whatever approach. In general, if we are attentive to our child’s needs while encouraging them to develop their independence to safely explore and master the world with your support, all will be fine. Flexibility and a willingness to grow and change ourselves is key. Finally, the research consistently shows that parents must balance their needs with those of their children for the best health outcomes.

Let’s not take the bait from Time Magazine and get caught in judging ourselves or other moms. There’s nothing to be gained. Whether we compete over how we raise our children or bringing the best school snack, losing the invaluable support of other moms isn’t worth it. Not for me!  The poet Rumi said, “Out beyond ideas of right-and wrong-doing, there’s a field. I’ll meet you there.”

This week is women’s health week and the week before our self-care challenge. Let’s join arms together to declare that women deserve to make their health and well-being a priority by making your health and well-being a priority this week and next. Now, that’s a battle worth fighting.

The Bare Necessities

Posted on by Dr. Diane Sanford in May Tips, Self-Care Month, Thursday "Words of Wisdom"

This month, we are writing about specific techniques to reduce stress based on Diane’s Top Ten Tips Plus Two. Today, I’d like to concentrate on, “Nourish your body with food, sleep, activity and rest.” It sounds like a no-brainer, doesn’t it? But when we chop this tip into pieces, we can see where we’re lacking.

1. Nourish Your Body With Food: I’m fairly sure that everyone that’s reading this eats every once in a while. But with busy days, sometimes we don’t take the time to make or buy something healthy. We end up going through the drive thru or getting a bag of chips out of the vending machine. This kind of diet will make you gain weight, raise your cholesterol, and increase your chances to develop Diabetes and heart disease. Think about it – how can you make time for eating healthy foods when you’re on the run? Many fast food chains offer some healthier choices, but cooking at home is the best because you’ll know everything that’s in your meal and can control its caloric content.

2. Nourish Your Body With Sleep: Raise your hand if you get 7 – 8 hours of uninterrupted sleep at night. Since I don’t see any hands up, I’m assuming you’re trying to live on 4 – 6 hours per night. Some of you may be operating on even less, especially if you just had a baby. The trick is to get at least 5 hours of uninterrupted sleep per night. You may need to get your partner or family member involved so you can sleep while the other person tends to the baby. All of you other women who are not sleeping enough: find a way to go to bed earlier! Lack of sleep can also increase your risk for heart disease, stroke and depression.

3. Nourish Your Body With Activity and Rest: So many jobs involve sitting behind a desk or in front of a computer. This creates a very sedentary day! If your workplace has stairs, use them! Take a walk on your lunch break. Do stretches at your desk. Most experts agree that getting aerobic exercise for at least 20 minutes, 3 times a week will help you lose fat, gain muscle and make you feel great! Exercise releases endorphins, which are the same neurotransmitters that are released during orgasm! On the other side of the spectrum, we also need to take time out to rest. Not sleep – rest. Lie on your couch and breathe. Let the stresses of the day evaporate and let yourself slowly transition from work to home (or from homemaker to peace and relaxation).

Which tips are you already using? Which ones would you like to use? If you give these tips a try, let us know how it goes and you will be entered into our May Self-Care Challenge! Good luck!

Sanford’s “Five A Day” For May

Posted on by Dr. Diane Sanford in May Tips, Monday Musings

Last week, Stacey and I declared May Self-Care Month, and asked you to pick a self-care tip from our Top Ten Tips Plus Two to practice for the month. Many of you responded by saying you agreed.

Long before this blog was born, I discovered the only way to take good care of those we love is to take good care of ourselves. That’s how I developed my “Five A Day”- self-care skills critical to health and well-being. Since several of you mentioned working on these, #2 on our self-care list, here they are:

1.    Nutrition.  Eat at regular intervals to keep your body fueled and substitute healthy snacks for meals when needed.   Consume food mindfully without distractions like TV or cell-phones.  Eat healthy 75% of the time.

2.    Sleep.  Research shows that we need 8-9 hours of sleep for mental and physical health.  So, create a bedtime routine which quiets your mind instead of working until your head hits the pillow.  Lack of restful sleep diminishes  physical and emotional health.

3.    Physical Activity.  Recent studies indicate there are many successful ways to exercise from 15-20 minutes daily or  3-4 times weekly for an hour.  A combination of cardio, strength, and flexibility is best. Remember, exercise improves mood and longevity.

4.    Rest.  Take breaks.  Periods of activity/energy expenditure require periods of recuperation.  Our bodies aren’t designed to run full-tilt 24/7.

5.    Stress. Be aware of physical signs of stress: muscle tension, headaches, and GI symptoms.  If these occur, do something restorative-nap, workout, read, or whatever soothes you.  Don’t wait!

As a mom, wife, and daughter, I know it’s easy to neglect our health needs while insisting that our loved ones attend to theirs. I remember when my children were young, eating what they left on their plates for my meal. Taking a break was throwing in a load of laundry or picking up. I joke with friends that I didn’t exercise for 15 years although every day was a workout. With regard to stress management, suffice it to say I didn’t.

Please join us in declaring May self-care month. It’s worked for us. It can work for you.