Tag: life balance

The 5 Best Self-Care Resources on the Net

Posted on by Dr. Diane Sanford in July Tips, Thursday "Words of Wisdom"

When it comes to self-care, it can be tough to find resources that are both of quality and informative. In order to make the search easier, here are the 5 best self-care resources on the web (in no particular order):

1. Self-Compassion: A Healthier Way of Relating to Yourself – Dr. Kristin Neff from the University of Texas at Austin provides a comprehensive site with resources, books and exercises in self-care. She also offers guided meditation videos and scripts, as well as research on the topic of self-compassion.

2. Kind Over Matter – this site is run like a community, with forums, free downloadable inspirational material and eBooks. According to the site’s creator, Laura, Kind Over Matter “… [helps readers] lead authentic lives doing what we love & by sharing that, by giving it a voice, we are helping more people step into their dreams & greatness.”

3. Psychology Today – the partner site to Psychology Today magazine contains many articles about self-care, self-compassion, relationships and coping mechanisms for stress.

4. Mindful Self-Compassion – psychotherapist Dr. Christopher Germer, based in Arlington, MA, provides a site that contains free downloadable exercises, free audio meditations, books and the opportunity to sign up for one of his many workshops.

5. Living Self-Care – you’re already here! Our blog, updated bi-weekly, provides tips and exercises that promote self-care. We also have a “self-care challenge” 2 times a year in which everyone is a winner.

The quest for self-care is heating up as people around the globe realize that most of their problems stem from lack of it! While there are other, smaller sites on the topic, the 5 listed above are the most comprehensive and useful for anyone interested in the subject.

Sex and Creativity: The Power of the Second Chakra

Posted on by Dr. Diane Sanford in July Tips, Monday Musings

As you know, I recently spent a week at “Seduction of Spirit,” a signature workshop given by Deepak Chopra and his talented Chopra Center instructors. While there, we studied the seven “chakras” or energy centers in our body. Today, I want to pass on what I learned about our second chakra-the seat of our sexual energy and creativity-physical, mental, emotional and spiritual.

Second chakra energy is critical to he evolution of consciousness which depends on sexual union and procreation but also our union with universal consciousness which you may call God, Jesus Christ, Buddha or your higher power. What this means is that by expressing yourself creatively in your own unique way through the arts and who you, you enable life to change for the better. If this sounds a little “woo woo,” keep listening because when you are in harmony with the “cosmic dance,” life is an endless, creative pursuit which flows effortlessly.

Here’s what Patanjali, the author of Yoga Sutras had to say in the first to third century B.C.

“When you inspired by some great purpose, some extraordinary project, all your thoughts break their bounds;

Your mind transcends limitations, your consciousness expands in every direction, and you find yourself in a new great and wonderful world;

Dormant forces, faculties, and talents come alive, and your discover yourself to be a greater person by far than you ever dreamed yourself to be.”

This week express second chakra energy by connecting with your authentic self through pleasure and joy, physically, emotionally, and spirituality. Abandon yourself to the cosmic dance. Let the energy of the universe flow through you free and unbounded.

Enjoy!

Sex: Why We Love It and Why It’s Okay

Posted on by Dr. Diane Sanford in July Tips, Thursday "Words of Wisdom"

Sex: it’s everywhere! From slacks to soda, the concept of sex is used in print, Internet and TV ads more than any other theme of everyday life. What’s so alluring about the idea of sex and sexy things that draws us to it like moths to a flame?

That is not a simple question to answer, unfortunately. There are so many factors that tie in with the concept of sexuality, there’s no one that can be identified. However, since sex is something all humans have in common, whether it’s the act or the urge to act, just about everyone can relate to the general concept. And when people relate to something, they are more likely to buy it or support it.

There’s also the allure of the “forbidden fruit” or taboo aspect. Humans want things that are considered no-no’s by society. We want to feel individualized and rebellious. Even though sex is way more widely visible in today’s world than it was even 10 years ago, there’s still a stigma attached to it. Sex is something people do behind closed doors; it’s secret. That’s another reason we react the way we do.

In this heat wave, many people are choosing to stay inside in the air conditioning. And, as in the wintertime, when folks are thrown together in such close company, many are heating up the bedroom. Sex is an important part of self-care, as it relieves stress, releases our natural painkillers (called endorphins), and generally elevates our mood. So no matter the reason you find yourself drawn to the concept of sex, keep in mind that it’s part of healthy self-care; and therefore, you are not a pervert for thinking about it!

Happy heat wave!

Sex Isn’t Just to Procreate-It’s Important for Self-Care

Posted on by Dr. Diane Sanford in July Tips

Let’s face it – summer is hot. This summer is no exception, especially in the Midwest where the temperatures are hotter than the sub-tropics. What better time to talk about sex than when it’s hot?

Sex is hot, just like summer. Well, it can be if you want it to be. Your version of sex doesn’t have to match “those” kinds of movies or involve any fancy moves or technics. Sex is what you want and need it to be. Whether it’s more about intimacy or steamy, sweaty action, sex is part of the self-care continuum.

Are you wondering why I’m stating this to be true? In my opinion, what better way to instill a positive image in oneself than when you’re feeling confident and sexy with your partner? Many of us refuse to see the beauty in ourselves – inside or out. Sex and intimacy and the amount we have – or not — is a direct measure of our self-esteem, confidence and self-caring.

When we care about ourselves, we care about our bodies, our well-being and our ability to please ourselves and our partner. That’s why when we don’t get enough of it, sex becomes a chore when “babymaking,” or it isn’t fulfilling our needs, it can put a crimp in our self-care regimen.

Want my advice? Crank up the air conditioning, grab that partner and have some fun together! Don’t have someone to share sexy times with? There’s nothing wrong with taking care of you. That’s what self-care is all about! Have a safe and sexy summer!

Today’s “sexy” author is Mollee Bauer, founder of pregnancy.org, the premier website for info, advice and support for pregnancy, new moms and early motherhood. To visit, click here.

Making Positive Ripples

Posted on by Dr. Diane Sanford in June Tips, Thursday "Words of Wisdom"

The image of dropping a stone into a body of water has been used throughout time to illustrate The Butterfly Effect – or the ripples it causes. There has been a spotlight in the last couple of years on the concept of “paying it forward.” But what does all this mean?

We have no idea how many people our actions touch. The ripples in the water represent not only those people that we know we’re influencing (the rings in the center), but the folks that we would never guess we affect (the outer rings). For example, Jean decided to clean out her closet and donate her used clothing to a charity that helps clothe indigent women. The clothes arrive at the charity and get assigned to various women. The volunteer who helps each woman feels good about her work. Her client, Bess, looks in the mirror and, for the first time, sees someone who has confidence. Bess goes on a job interview and the interviewer thinks she is very professional looking. The mail guy, Mike, is doing his rounds and catches Bess’s eye. He asks her out after her interview and she says yes. They successfully date for a year and then get engaged. So, to hit this point home, Jean thought she was just donating clothes when really, indirectly, she helped two people find each other.

Keep in mind that the ripples from our words and actions go far. Be selective about what you say and do. Choose words of kindness and encouragement (especially when using self-talk). Do positive things, from helping a single person to changing the world. Always put your best foot forward because you never know whom you will touch in those outer ripples!

P.S. Happy Birthday to my Daddy! You’re still awesome!! – Stacey

Be Your Own Advocate

Posted on by Dr. Diane Sanford in May Tips, Thursday "Words of Wisdom"

What a great Self-Care Challenge we had! Thank you to all who participated! Diane and I will announce winners and prizes next week, as I am on my way to a training today. We put ourselves first, and instead of rushing and scrambling to get things out this week, we are moving it back. It is always our hope to be good role models for you!

As I write this, I am in the Emergency Room at a hospital in the Houston Medical Center with a good friend who fell ill this morning. As I talk to various healthcare professionals, it struck me just how important advocating for your own healthcare is. Not only do we need to supply information, but we need to ASK for information. If a doctor or nurse wants to treat you with something, it is your right to ask them exactly what they are doing. If you don’t want that treatment or if you have questions about an alternate treatment, speak up!

It’s only natural to feel at the mercy of a doctor. Our society teaches that folks such as doctors, lawyers, police and teachers are authority figures who can’t be questioned. The truth is that your healthcare team is actually working for YOU. Use critical thinking and ask questions; try to get past any feelings of intimidation. And if someone is rude or mistreats you, make sure you take action by reporting that person to their supervisors or filing a complaint with a Patient Liason.

Hopefully you won’t see the inside of a hospital anytime soon, but if you do, remember that YOU come first!

To read more, check out this article from The Hospitals and Health Networks.

Self-Care Challenge Day 5: Interior/Exterior

Posted on by Dr. Diane Sanford in Uncategorized

I never understood – in fact, I always had a problem with – airline instructions of putting on an oxygen mask on yourself first, then on to others … that is not until Saturday when my friend came over. The more she talked, the more apparent it became that she was stretched so thin and was so frazzled in her pursuit of perfection at work and parenting, that she was miserable. Then it clicked; she needed to put her oxygen mask on first. She needed to take care of herself first to be better in other areas of her life…but so do I. May is my month of improvement. I didn’t pick one technique; I chose all and try (and I say try) every day to remind myself that all these things were important – I was putting on my oxygen mask first.

I was so thrilled to be asked to write a guest post as I feel strongly in women’s self care. Since my blog, adetailedhouse.com, expresses my love of interior design, what better place than to start at home? A warm, welcoming retreat has a ripple effect in one’s overall well-being and life. Even animals need their dens and nests. I find the atmosphere in my home the most essential thing to my ability to relax. Chaos in my space unwittingly leads to chaos in my mind. Colors, styles, textures, art and tastes are very personal and each person has a visceral reaction to them. The key is finding what speaks to you so you can be soothed mentally, physically and spiritually.

I’d like to give a visual of what I mean, but without commentary so that you can feel the rooms and see what you respond to:

Surround yourself with what you love
Darker and bolder
Vibrant color
Whitest whites

Pale and soothing

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Our guest blogger, Kearney, is the author of A Detailed House, a blog that shares tips and anecdotes about interior design and life with 2 young daughters.