Tag: holiday stress relief

Recharge Your Battery to Welcome the New Year

Posted on by Dr. Diane Sanford in Thursday "Words of Wisdom"

For a healthy and happy new year, you need to have the energy to enjoy it. Our self-care tip this post-holiday weekend is to rest and recharge your battery.  Don’t put pressure on yourself for playdates, taking the children out or visiting friends and family unless that’s easier for you.  Resist preparing  gourmet meals, downloading holiday pictures or catching up on errands.  You have the entire  year ahead.

What to do instead?  Rest.  Restore.  Recharge.  No child has ever died from a diet of hot dogs and macaroni.  In fact, many of them prefer it.  They will gladly wear the same clothes and don’t care if their rooms are a mess.  Also, let them entertain themselves.  What about the new toys they took seconds to unwrap?  They can play with them!

The holidays are a particularly challenging time to balance our needs with those of others. But we must persist if we are to greet the new year with a healthy and positive outlook.

As we always say, you need to keep your pitcher filled to take care of yourself and those you love.  Don’t run yourself ragged like little Spudgy and miss out on the fun.  Give yourself a break this weekend.  You deserve it.   And get some sleep.

Holiday Survival in the Suburbs-Part 2

Posted on by Dr. Diane Sanford in Thursday "Words of Wisdom"

Look for what worked before: remember what everyone liked and repeat it. For many years, we had our tradition of the Wednesday- before-Thanksgiving-cookie-day. After a lazy morning, we saw a movie, baked our favorite chocolate chip cookies and finished the day with cheeseburgers.

People love helping in the kitchen. I never have everything completely finished. People congregate in the kitchen anyway- give them purpose while visiting. Everyone loves doing something-especially if it’s not their house or their responsibility.

Find what works for you when/if you get stressed. When I do get stressed, I take big breaths and concentrate on the outcome I want. (I also eat chocolate and take a walk). Whatever healthy strategy you can find-exercise, gatherings with girlfriends, reading a book, a massage- make sure you take advantage and DO IT.

Focus on the positive. It makes me happy to focus on the simple, enjoyable and memorable. “It’s all good” can be a way of life. Think about your own circumstances, realize how fortunate you are and do something nice for someone.

Life is too precious to be stressed out by circumstances we may not remember. I believe if I am less stressed, the kids will be also. I try to take care of my family by not planning too much and by being in the moment with them.

Pam Wilson is the author of S.O.S From Suburbia, a humorous look at surviving the craziness of the suburbs which can be ordered on her website: www.sosfromsuburbia.vpweb.com

Holiday Survival in the Suburbs-Part 1

Posted on by Dr. Diane Sanford in Thursday "Words of Wisdom"

I love holiday traditions and making things fun and bright. I don’t love stress though or being overwhelmed. Hmm…you may wonder, how does that work?

As I thought about this year’s holiday madness, I wanted to list the things that help me stay calm when I get stressed (and I do!) If there’s so much stress involved, is it any fun….and more to the point worth it?!

First, remember people would rather be invited to a messy house with delivery pizza than not invited. Recently my friend Mimi called at the last minute, “Having people over, want to come?” Four families showed up for a pot-luck supper while we watched the Cardinals win game seven. Yes!

 Second, have the attitude,  “Let’s make this a party!”

Then combine friends, good food (a recipe I’ve been wanting to try), a party attitude and…the space to play. For kids that means either outside or in a basement. I can’t remember a time when the kids have been unhappy with this.

Being spontaneous can also work in your favor. Recently we were at friends and the hostess said, “I just got these Midnight Special videos, do you want to watch?” We were skeptical, but said yes. It turned out to be one of the most entertaining evenings we’ve had singing along to favorites from the ‘70’s and ‘80’s and sharing stories about our lives then. Totally fun.

Today’s author Pam Wilson is author of S.O.S From Suburbia. For more info visit www.sosfromsuburbia.vpweb.com.

Read This for Holiday Stress Relief

Posted on by Dr. Diane Sanford in Monday Musings

The holidays are here with fun-filled and stress-filled times sandwiched together, not unlike raising children, work, marriage and other life pursuits. So, here are some recommendations to make the holidays calmer and happier.

First, have realistic expectations of yourself.  Many of us feel disappointed because our “fairytale images” don’t materialize. Instead, focus on feeling good from the inside out.  Build a fire and roast marshmallows, shop with a friend, or take a long walk in the woods.  Meditate, workout, read, or  listen to music.  Feed your soul.

Second, have realistic expectations of others.  No one’s family or friends are perfect, and the holidays won’t change this.  Since we can’t change them, we need to rely on ourselves to gather what’s positive and let go of the negative.  Create new family traditions so they don’t stir up bad memories.  If a situation becomes too negative, leave.

Likewise, don’t take relationship stress too personally.   If your partner snaps about household clutter because they’re stringing Christmas lights while baking cookies, understand it’s their problem.  Don’t let them take their bad mood out on you but don’t react poorly either.  After all, love is the true intention of the season and it starts with you.

Finally, if you need a gift for a pregnant or new mom,  preview our new book, Life Will Never Be the Same: The Real Mom’s Postpartum Survival Guide at http://www.realmomexperts.com.  It’s filled with great advice for surviving and thriving new motherhood and beyond.  You might enjoy it too!

A Self-Care Christmas

Posted on by Dr. Diane Sanford in Thursday "Words of Wisdom"

It’s tempting to get caught up in the quest to give our loved ones the “perfect Christmas” — especially when we see visions of it plastered all over our television screens and in magazines.That’s a lot of pressure and work. And if something goes wrong, we feel we’ve failed.

Last year I realized the “cure” for holiday burnout was to shift my perspective. We still put up a tree, decorated the outside of the house with lights and bought presents. We just scaled back a bit. The emphasis was on finding balance including mindful spending, skipping out on a few social obligations in lieu of more family time and forgoing the holiday baking. (Because I have enough dirty dishes piled up in the sink.) This year, I decided the “family present” would be to hire someone to deep clean the house before hosting company. (So maybe that’s more of a gift for me. But we all know if mama’s not happy, no one is.)

I’m pretty sure when my son is grown and looks back on his childhood Christmases, he won’t remember how the tree was decorated or how many gifts he received. But he will remember the times we spent together laughing, lounging and loving every minute of each other’s company. And to me? That’s what’s most important.

Today’s author is Lisa Bertrand, founder of StLFamilyLife. We love this post and wanted to share it with you before you’re engulfed in holiday madness to help keep perspective.

Spread Gratitude in Your Heart and Beyond

Posted on by Dr. Diane Sanford in Monday Musings

Last week, our theme for the self-care challenge was expressing gratitude and thankfulness. Many of you commented that you liked Friday’s challenge which was to send gratitude to others by “choosing someone you want to express thanks to for what they’ve done, who they are or what they mean to you. It can be someone you’re close to or someone you may have fallen out of touch with. Let your heart and soul decide.

Then message that person via e-mail or Facebook, text them, make a call or send a note. Once they receive your message, ask them to choose someone to express their gratitude towards and contact them. The goal is to connect as many people as possible with thankfulness and appreciation, keeping the true spirit of the season alive. Let’s see how many cities, states, and countries we can reach and how far our message can spread.”

Since Thanksgiving is Thursday, we hope you’ll make this a weeklong activity. Let family and friends know your gratitude for them. Perform random acts of kindness like smiling at the grocery clerk or saying “Hi” to a neighbor. When someone is thoughtful towards you, show them your appreciation. Did you know that when you are kind or someone is thoughtful towards you, it improves your and their health and mood?  It also has a positive influence on those observing.

Join us on twitter and Facebook for conversation and support in spreading an attitude of gratitude. Best to all of you!

Let the Challenge Begin-Express Gratitude Daily

Posted on by Dr. Diane Sanford in Monday Musings

Welcome to Day 1 of the self-care challenge/contest. We’re glad you’re here. Our theme for the week will be expressing gratitude and thankfulness for all the aspects of our lives which enrich and nourish us.

To get started, choose a coin or personal item which will be your gratitude token for the week. Place it on your bedroom dresser or nightstand and when you wake up in the morning, think of 3 things you are grateful for and then place your token in your pocket or purse to carry with you. In the evening before you go to bed, think of 3 different things you are grateful for and then place your token back on your nightstand/dresser. Do this daily, expanding your list to include as many sources of thankfulness as you can.

If you’d prefer an online version of this activity, go to twitter and each morning list 3 things you’re thankful for and again in the evening with the hashtag #listof3 or on our Facebook page www.facebook.com/livingselfcare.
Sometimes, it helps to see what others are saying especially on the days when
your emotional pitcher is empty. It doesn’t have to be original for it to be meaningful and seeing others’ gratitude may help lift your spirit.

Tonight at 8:30pm EST join us on #ppdchat for “Self-Care, Gratitude, and Easing Holiday Stress.” Also, listen to our podcast about “Living the Self-Care Challenge” at http://ow.ly/7hkKZ  with @mamasonbedrest. Let’s have a great week supporting each other in living self-care. Our holiday gift to you!

Finding Your Happy Place

Posted on by Dr. Diane Sanford in Uncategorized

 You just wrapped up your holiday festivities and this years’ “fun” has left you more stressed than ever.  It’s time to find your happy place.

Your happy place is the place you go when you need to rejuvenate.  It can be your bath tub or your favorite chair where you can escape with a good book.  And if your happy place is a beach in Aruba where you know you can’t literally go, escape there in your mind.  The point is you need to get to that happy place and you really should visit daily.  Some experts say taking just 15 minutes a day for YOU can make all the difference in the world in your outlook and your health.  Don’t think you have 15 minutes for you? Well, if you believe it’s simply not possible, you’ll be right. But imagine how sweet it would be if you were wrong on this one!

Think about all the things you consider important in life.  Shouldn’t you be on that list?  Where do you go to escape the stress of daily life? Tell me about it and inspire other moms to find their happy place, too.

Today’s guest author is Desiree Miller, mom of 4, who developed her motherhood expertise into a baby planning business, www.bottlestobritches.com. 

As Ann and I said many times during the 21-day self-care challenge, 15 minutes  is a great start toward filling your emotional pitcher and making your  health and well-being a priority.  Go Desiree.

After Christmas Prescription: Rest and Restore

Posted on by Dr. Diane Sanford in Uncategorized

I was visiting with my cousin at my mother’s annual holiday party when he commented to me he was glad to have “endured” Christmas.  I told him that once his children were older, like mine who are now 22 and 18, he would enjoy the holiday more.  I recalled how I felt after decorating, shopping, wrapping, and celebrating with the girls in tow, and how my joy was tempered by exhaustion.

Our self-care tip this post-holiday week is to rest and recharge your battery.  Don’t put pressure on yourself for playdates, taking the children out or visiting friends and family unless that’s easier for you.  Resist preparing  gourmet meals, downloading holiday pictures or catching up on errands.  You have the entire  year ahead.

What to do instead?  Rest.  Restore.  Recharge.  No child has ever died from a diet of hot dogs and macaroni.  In fact, many of them prefer it.  They will gladly wear the same clothes and don’t care if their rooms are a mess.  Also, let them entertain themselves.  What about the new toys they took seconds to unwrap?  They can play with them!

For a healthy and happy new year, you need to have the energy to enjoy it.  As Ann and I always say, you must keep your pitcher filled to take care of yourself and those you love.  Don’t run yourself ragged like little Spudgy and miss out on the fun.  Give yourself a break this week.  You deserve it.   And get some sleep.

Happy Holidays! Self-Care Books We Love

Posted on by Dr. Diane Sanford in Uncategorized

After watching Oprah’s holiday gift show, Ann and I thought seriously about a gift for all of you for your generosity of living self-care with us. As avid readers, we’re gifting you a list of our favorite self-care books. Here’s to your health and happiness.

Life Will Never Be the Same: The Real Mom’s Postpartum Survival Guide. Our new book on what to expect emotionally after having a baby, and how to survive and thrive new motherhood. Detailed self-care plan for all moms.

Even June Cleaver Would Forget the Juice Box: Cut Yourself Some Slack (and Still Raise Great Kids) in the Age of Extreme Parenting. Ann’s most recent solo work, offering concrete ways to change the thinking behind today’s “perfection parenting.” Quit second guessing “am I a good mom?” “How’d I wreck my kid’s life today?” and embrace that you already are a perfectly good parent.

Women’s Bodies, Women’s Wisdom.Dr. Christiane Northrup’s comprehensive book on women’s health and how our emotional life affects us. Great advice about healing from emotional pain and caring for our bodies and souls. Thanks to Dr. Northrup for recommending Life Will Never Be the Same.

The Dance of Anger The essential classic by Harriet Lerner, guiding women through letting go and using anger as a tool for change in lasting relationships. EVERY woman needs this book. Thanks to Harriet for recommending Even June Cleaver Would Forget the Juice Box.

Gift one (or all!) to yourself or a woman you love today.