Can a Video Game Help with Self Care?

Recently, a good friend brought a game to my attention. When she said, “You have to check out this game!” my first reaction was, “No thank you…I don’t need another distraction!” I’ve never been much of a gamer, and I think the reason is because I can become obsessive about something fairly easily.

My friend persisted and convinced me to watch the game’s inventor, Jane McGonigal, explain the concept behind her idea. Once I realized that this “game” was really about promoting self-care, I jumped on board and started “playing.”

The game, which can be downloaded from most app stores or played online, is called SuperBetter. I originally chuckled at the name because it sounds like some kind of bad Japanese translation. But as I started playing, I couldn’t think of any name that was better suited for it!

Here’s the gist: like in most games, you are the central character. You can make a “secret identity” if you wish – really it’s a cool way of creating an online persona. You can form alliances with anyone else who is playing the game (it works with people who are not playing, too, but it’s not as effective). You identify your own “bad guys” – the things that are your greatest challenges AND your own “power ups” which are the things that you know make you feel better. It’s basically a guide to making your own personal self-care plan. It does not take a lot of time to play – you can do most things in less than 5 minutes. BUT IT WORKS. I can tell if I have gone a whole day without playing just by checking in with my tension levels.

SuperBetter, at the very least, is a reminder that you need to take care of yourself. But at the most – it can add years to your life, strengthen friendships, problem-solve obstacles and provide a community to share your experiences. If this sounds like something you’d like to experience, make sure to watch Jane’s video to hear her scientifically researched rationale behind the game. Then download the app or visit the SuperBetter site and get ready to feel…well, SuperBetter!

May 2012 Self-Care Challenge Champions!

Since many of us (Stacey and I included) won’t be celebrating the 4th with fireworks because our dry, hot weather has turned the country into a fire hazard, we wanted to find an alternate way to celebrate. So, we decided to announce the winners of our May Self-Care Challenge!

No, we didn’t forget! But as many moms know, May and June are jam-packed and sometimes life gets in the way of our best intentions. Now that the madness has slowed down, we are excited to announce our winners although any woman who practices self-care is a winner to us.

1. Manicure courtesy of MamaSpace: Sue S.

2. Amazon.com gift card courtesy of Pregnancy.org: Angie L.

3. Books and t-shirt courtesy of Postpartum Support International: Mamingwa

4. Pedicure kit courtesy of Linda Meyer: Julie

Congratulations to each of you, not only for winning a prize, but for living self-care. And in spite of the heat, Happy 4th!

 

Stacey bravely does her motherly duties at DisneyWorld. Who knew Nemo was such a MAN? 😉

It’s Cyber Monday-See If You’ve Won

True to our mission here at livingselfcare, Lauren and I took last week off to recharge and enjoy the holiday. Since today is Cyber Monday, we thought it would be fitting to announce the winners of our Nov.14-18 2011 Self-Care Challenge Contest.

Here they are:

dianne@femininefaceofmoney.com – $100 SpaWish certificate from Pregnancy.org

http://outoftheclearblue.wordpress.com – $25 Shutterfly Gift Certificate via Working Moms Against Guilt

melody.meiners@gmail.com – $25 Maternique Gift Certifiicate from Darline Turner-Lee of Mamas on Bedrest

starfish810@hotmail.com – Happy Family clothing & PSI Educational DVD via Postpartum Support International

felicia3@gmail.com– A copy of A Life’s Work by Rachel Cusk via Postpartum Progress

lisa07110@yahoo.com – Jewelry set via Mother to Mother Support

simply.homemade@yahoo.com– Deluxe Prize Basket from Real Mom Experts

Congratulations to all our winners! You’ll be contacted via email with additional details regarding how to claim your prizes.

Thank you again to all the wonderful Challenge Champions. We couldn’t have done it without you! Also, to all of you who participated in our weeklong self-care challenge. If you missed out, you can still go back to the posts and participate in the daily gratitude activities. Thankfulness is always timely and a great way to practice self-care.

Give Thanks Everyday

There have been certain times in my life that were more challenging than others. Challenges not only make you stronger, but they force you to get out of your normal and comfortable routine. Without challenges in our lives there is no room for growth or opportunity for gratitude.

My experience with postpartum depression was negative and frightening, but I am thankful that it created the stronger, better, mom and person I am now. I am thankful that my experience led me to help other moms struggling with the same feelings and let them know that they are not alone. I am thankful to have met so many wonderful people on my life’s journey.

Think about people you have met in your lifetime, the influence that each and every one of them has had on your life. Let someone know that you appreciate them. Thank someone for their time or kind gesture. Think about things you are you thankful for: a pet, flowers in your garden, the opportunity to travel. Giving thanks is a powerful positive message that can become part of your daily routine and improve your life. I didn’t learn to give thanks; it was something I created within myself. There are many benefits to giving thanks. Express gratitude today and always.

Linda Meyer is the Executive Director of Mother to Mother in St. Louis, MO. Mother to Mother provides free telephone support, group support and resources to women experiencing emotional difficulties during pregnancy and postpartum. www.mothertomothersupport.org

Spread Gratitude in Your Heart and Beyond

Last week, our theme for the self-care challenge was expressing gratitude and thankfulness. Many of you commented that you liked Friday’s challenge which was to send gratitude to others by “choosing someone you want to express thanks to for what they’ve done, who they are or what they mean to you. It can be someone you’re close to or someone you may have fallen out of touch with. Let your heart and soul decide.

Then message that person via e-mail or Facebook, text them, make a call or send a note. Once they receive your message, ask them to choose someone to express their gratitude towards and contact them. The goal is to connect as many people as possible with thankfulness and appreciation, keeping the true spirit of the season alive. Let’s see how many cities, states, and countries we can reach and how far our message can spread.”

Since Thanksgiving is Thursday, we hope you’ll make this a weeklong activity. Let family and friends know your gratitude for them. Perform random acts of kindness like smiling at the grocery clerk or saying “Hi” to a neighbor. When someone is thoughtful towards you, show them your appreciation. Did you know that when you are kind or someone is thoughtful towards you, it improves your and their health and mood?  It also has a positive influence on those observing.

Join us on twitter and Facebook for conversation and support in spreading an attitude of gratitude. Best to all of you!

Let’s See How Far Our Gratitude Can Spread

It’s the final day of our self-care challenge and hopefully you’re less stresed and feeling better from this week’s gratitude activities. Now, it’s time to spread the cheer. Remember when you used to play telephone and whisper messages in your friends’ ears passing them from one to the next. At the end, you’d laugh over how the message changed and start again.

Today’s challenge is to send gratitude to others in whatever way works for you. Choose someone you want to express thanks to for what they’ve done, who they are or what they mean to you. It can be someone you’re close to or someone you may have fallen out of touch with. Let your heart and soul decide. You won’t be misled.

Then message that person via e-mail or Facebook, text them, make a call or send a note. Once they receive your message, ask them to choose someone to express their gratitude towards and contact them. The goal is to connect as many people as possible with thankfulness and appreciation, keeping the true spirit of the season alive. Let’s see how many cities, states, and countries we can reach and how far our message can spread.

At livingselfcare, we want to thank each of you for joining us this past week and sharing your posts and comments, and to each of the challenge champions for their participation and generosity. Let us always remember what we’re thankful for during the holidays and each day of our lives.

Change in the Weather, Change in Attitude

The cold weather is creeping in, or already here in most states. It’s hard to relate to winter when you live in the sub-tropics of sunny South Florida, like myself.

Winter’s notorious for the cold, darker days and feelings of melancholy, depression, or lethargy seeping in. How do we combat the winter blahs from freezing us? Turn that blah attitude around to an attitude of gratitude! What better way to empower yourself than to take the positive steps necessary to make yourself healthy and whole!

We’ve started the Self-Care Challenge, and the results are trickling in. From women realizing they’re not taking care of themselves, to women reaching out to one another in thanks and gratitude, it’s clear that we’re becoming better educated about what it means to live self-care.

Here’s today’s challenge activity. It’s also perfect for Thanksgiving. Looking for that special centerpiece? Why not make a “GratitudeTree?” You can gather up twigs and other decorations, and place them in a vase. Cut out special pieces of paper, and with a “hole punch,” punch a hole and add a bit of ribbon. When your family and friends arrive, have each person write what they’re thankful for on their special tag and hang it from the “tree.” This creates the attitude of gratitude for the entire group, and leaves you with special keepsakes you can treasure year after year.

Today’s author is Mollee Bauer, founder of Pregnancy.org which gives moms the tools they need to empower themselves and practice self-care.

Doing A Good Deed for Each Other-Priceless

With the focus on gift-giving during the holidays, we sometimes forget that one of the most precious gifts we can share is doing something kind or thoughtful for each other. Today’s activity is to do a good deed for a family member or friend to express your gratitude for them being a part of your life.

There are three guidelines for this activity. First, choose something which you know your family member/friend would appreciate even if it’s different than what you want to do for them. An example, my mom asked me to help clean her closet for her holiday gift and while I’d much rather run an errand, make her a meal or buy her a present, that’s not what she wants from me.

Second, it must come from the heart and be done in the spirit of generosity. Doing it in a begrudging or resentful way is not the intention of today’s challenge. Remember, this is a “gift” for someone you love. Third, it can’t cost anything. Giving your time and attention to your family and friends is truly more valuable than anything money can buy.

Finally, consider making this an activity for the whole family. It’s a great way to express an attitude of gratitude toward all those you love.

Today’s inspiration: “It is only through the heart that one can see rightly; what is essential is invisible to the eye.” Antoine de Saint-Exupéry, The Little Prince.

Contest Postponed: Taking Time for Self-Care

Last week I was reviewing plans for the self-care contest/challenge with Mollee Bauer of pregnancy.org when we realized the contest needed additional planning to succeed, so I’m  postponing it from Oct.2-8 to Nov.14-18. Also, my emotional pitcher was nearing empty. As we often say,  you can’t give others what you don’t have so I gave myself a 3-day weekend to recharge.

This weekend, I haven’t done anything special. In fact, I haven’t done much at all. Truly nirvana. However, I wanted to share a few gifts with you since the contest/challenge is delayed. Here they are. First, the theme of the contest will be gratitude and thankfulness. Each day we’ll have an activity to complete which expresses our theme. Over the next few weeks, if you come up with an activity we use during the contest, you’ll win a box of Godiva chocolates. Please put your suggestions in the comment section of this or future posts.

Second, the following are links to other web resources for living self-care from several wonderful women I’ve met online and other articles/interviews I’ve  done recently.  For pregnancy and post-birth health, visit pregnancy.org. For self-care tips, listen to my podcast with Darline Turner of mamasonbedrest. Read about making motherhood work for you on totstoteensmagazine or look at my 7 Sanity-Saving Tips at babycenter.com. Good suggestions for anyone.

Don’t forget to send us a contest idea and remember, “Self-care is like chocolate, you can never have enough.”

More Spring Cleaning

Here are some additional thoughts on how to renew ourselves and release old, worn thoughts and habits.  Spring cleaning from the inside out.

Discover what’s nourishing.  Just as plants need water and sunshine to grow, we need physical, emotional, and spiritual sustenance.  Start with eating healthy foods, getting regular physical activity, sleeping 8-9 hours, and taking breaks for your mind and body.  Do one thing you enjoy daily, whether it’s phoning a friend, listening to music or walking your dog.  Nurture your spirit through prayer, meditation, or communing with nature. 

Let go of un-nourishing relationships.  Being honest about admitting and detaching from relationships which aren’t good anymore can still hurt especially   ones involving family and long-term friends.  If we’ve spoken to them about what needs to be different and things haven’t changed over time, release them with love.   Clearing space for nourishing relationships to enter.

Cultivate optimism.  Looking more on the “sunny” side of life can be learned by shifting attention away from negative thoughts to more positive ones.  There are few situations which are all good or all bad.  Our great job may sour when we get a new boss.   An untimely move lead to a wonderful neighborhood with friends with love.  Prune your mind of unnecessary negativity. 

Practice gratitude

Photo by Real Mom Kim

When we feel grateful, our souls are nourished and restored.  We have a more positive attitude toward today and what lies ahead.  We feel connected to something bigger than ourselves.  Supported in the deepest sense.  Abundant and alive.