Tag: pregnancy

School is Now in Session!

Posted on by Dr. Diane Sanford in Monday Musings

As a mom of two teenagers and a toddler, organization and routine is important to decrease stress and maintain a healthy balance in my home.

Below are some ways
that I do this:

Schedule family time:  Allow your children to help plan a weekly family night.  An example is renting videos and watching them at home with favorite movie snacks to enjoy.  During family night, rules should be established, such as no texting or taking phone calls.

Choose chores:  Because everyone’s schedules are busier now, it is helpful to have a family meeting where everyone can decide which chores they will be responsible for.

Homework:  By providing your children a calendar and having one for yourself, both of you can jot down any special dates and scheduled tests.   Staying organized is the key to a successful school year!

Observe child’s behavior:   Be mindful of any changes in behavior, sleep, and eating behaviors.

Offer support and solutions:  Be your child’s strongest advocate.  Reach out to teacher s and counselors to help you and your child.

Listen:  Use car rides home and dinner time to talk with your child.

Real Mom Lisa

Today’s guest author is Lisa Salazar, MA, LMFT, LPC who is a licensed marriage and family therapist.  She has been married for 18 years and has 3 children.   Books in the Burbs is a blog that Lisa maintains to write book reviews.

Self-Care Contest Challenge Starts Oct.2: Fill ‘Er Up

Posted on by Dr. Diane Sanford in Monday Musings

In our book Life Will Never Be the Same: The Real Mom’s Postpartum Survival Guide about adjusting to life post-birth, we say “Self-care now is just as essential to being the best mother you can be as was taking vitamins, exercising, and getting prenatal care while you were pregnant.  To be a good mom, you must be good to yourself first, physically and emotionally.  To aim for a balance between yours and others’ needs. It’s best to tackle this issue now, because it’s one you’ll be facing for the rest of your life.”

Whether you’re a new mom or not, self-care is essential to health and well-being.  Again from our book, “A pitcher of water provides a clear demonstration of what we mean. Imagine that you are a pitcher of water.  You keep pouring out, giving and giving as you take care of the needs of those around you: baby, children, partner, family, friends and pets. If you do not take action to fill the pitcher up again, pretty soon it will be empty.  No one is a bottomless pitcher. What do you need in order to fill up the pitcher again?”

With the self-care challenge/contest only 2 weeks away, we want you to notice your current self-care practices and when you feel depleted or nourished.  Rabbi Hillel said, “If I am not for myself, who will be for me.  If I am only for myself, what am I?  If not now, when?”  Need help? We’re only a comment away.

 

Empower Yourself to BE YOU!

Posted on by Dr. Diane Sanford in Thursday "Words of Wisdom"

I’m on vacation this week so I’m running Kelly’s guest post which reminds us to be true to who we are.

To be empowered is to say “YES! This is who I am” rather than letting others define you.   To find your inner voice and strength and use it to control your mind, your body, and your thoughts, staying true to yourself whatever life presents.

Being empowered is to reject helplessness. It is finding the courage to face what frightens you, and instead learn what you can from these experiences. By searching out these silver linings you are refusing to let the pain or fear rule you. Redefining life’s challenges by what you’ve gained.

When is the last time you used your “pause button” and MADE the choice to listen to yourself, to appreciate who you are, or to ask yourself “what do I want?” Remember that only you are the expert on you. You have the strength to create your life and to connect with your inner voice.

So try asking yourself:

  • What truly matters to me?
  • What are my priorities?
  • What are the values that I
    strive to live by?
  • When I wake up tomorrow what
    do I want to remember about today?

And now concentrate. Focus.
Breathe. Listen. And just BE YOU.

Today’s author Kelly Caul, MSW, LCSW is founder of EMPOWERED Therapy, LLC, whose mission is to empower you to BE YOU through individual and group therapy.  Kelly can be reached through her website at www.kellycaul.com.

3 Weeks Until Fall Self-Care Contest/Challenge: Let’s Get This Party Started

Posted on by Dr. Diane Sanford in Monday Musings, Press Release

In the midwest where I live, there are definite signs that fall is upon us. Leaves are turning and days are growing shorter. Summer vacation is over, children are back in school and the air is buzzing with activity. Fall also signals impending holiday madness with too little time to get things done.

Which is why self-care is so important now and the reason we chose Mental Health Week (October 2-8) for our bi-annual self-care challenge/contest. We want to remind you to conserve some your energy now, like squirrels gathering acorns, to have enough for what’s ahead. Most of the tips in our contest/challenge take only 10-15 minutes but the resulting good feelings last much longer.

Last week, I spoke to Darline Turner of MamasOnBedrest about how moms/women can take better care of themselves whatever circumstances they find themselves in. Check out our podcast by clicking here. Darline is a champion for women’s health and said that she learned firsthand, like many of us, about the importance of self-care after becoming a mom.

Prior to the normal post-birth upheaval, her pregnancy journey was very stressful, which puts women even more at risk for postpartum issues. However, whether momss or not, women still have twice the depression men experience. For women,  self-care cannot be ignored.

Join us for our contest/challenge, 10/2-8. We’ll have more prizes, free downloads, and great advice. Meanwhile we still have Godiva Chocolates to give away. Find 5 friends to subscribe to our blog, livingselfcare, and you could be this week’s winner!

“Mommy Entrepeneur’s Recipe for Divalysscious Success”-Part 2

Posted on by Dr. Diane Sanford in Thursday "Words of Wisdom"

As the owner of Divalysscious Moms, a luxury lifestyle company for mothers and families, and the mother of two young children (Jackson, 7, and Oliver, 4), I am frequently asked how I balance motherhood, business and “me” time.  Here are my recommended ingredients.

1. Children Come First. That means any emails or calls can wait until the children are settled. When your children feel secure, everything works better.

2. Prioritize. Start your work before your children wake. Lessen your pain with a jumbo cup of coffee!

3. Have a routine.  Having breakfast with my boys, taking them to school, eating together, reading and snuggle-time are crucial.

4.  Have a “Mommy Time Out”.   Moms who run their own businesses also need “time out.”  As they say if mom isn’t happy, no one is. Take ten minutes to meditate, get a massage, or phone a friend to rejuvenate and preserve your sanity.

5.  Delegate.  Being a mom and business owner gives you the right to delegate, which means surrounding yourself with a team of positive, dedicated, high energy people.  My husband is my biggest supporter. We both work, and we make our schedules coordinate with the kids’ as best we can. Don’t be afraid to ask for help! It’s always better than having a meltdown.

Follow these tips and you will be an uber Divalysscious Mom. Remember, making yourself a priority is not something to feel guilty about! Happy moms make happy kids.

Today’s author is Lyss Stern, founder and CEO of Divalysscious Moms. Also on Facebook and Twitter.

Running On Empty? Fill Up With Meditation and Godiva Chocolate

Posted on by Dr. Diane Sanford in Monday Musings

There are many ways to self-nourish. Two of our favorites are meditation and chocolate. The past three weeks, we’ve been following the Chopra Center’s 21-day summer meditation challenge, listening for one to share here. Last Wednesday it was on “Make Yourself A Priority” and we thought, “That’s the one.” Before meditating, the instructor spoke about how most people don’t take time for self-care and it struck us again how widespread this problem is.

Click on this link to listen- http://www.chopracentermeditation.com/bestsellers/Meditation_Summer/Meditation_Summer.asp?id=5861.

Now, for the chocolate. To celebrate our almost first birthday which is October 9, we’re sponsoring a contest for our current and new subscribers. Because we want our October self-care contest/challenge to be the best yet, we’re asking that any subscriber get ten other friends, family, co-workers, etc. to join our blog, and we’ll enter you in a random weekly drawing for a box of Godiva chocolates for the month of September.

Winners will be chosen each Sunday and announced the following Monday. If you’ve never tasted Godiva chocolates, you’re in for a treat and if you have, you know how irresistable they are. For any new subscriber you recruit, have them leave your name in our comment box so you get credit.

We’re also asking you to give us your recommendations for favorite woman-or-mom-related blogs and websites, so we can include them in the October contest/self-care challenge.  This will help ensure that we continue to provide what you want.

And remember, “Self-care is like chocolate, you can never have enough!”

“Mommy Entrepeneur’s Recipe for Divalysscious Success”-Part 1

Posted on by Dr. Diane Sanford in Thursday "Words of Wisdom"

As the owner of Divalysscious Moms, a luxury lifestyle company for mothers and families, and the mother of two young children (Jackson, 7, and Oliver, 4), I am frequently asked how I balance motherhood, owning/operating my own business and making “me” time.  While every successful mother and business owner has a unique routine that works for her, I like to give other mothers my “Divalysscious Tips,” the ingredients I recommend for “Mommy Entrepreneur Success.”

1. Your Children Come First. That means that any email and phone call can wait until the children are happy and settled. With today’s technology, everything seems urgent; however, it’s not. When your children feel secure, everything works better.

2. Prioritize. Start your work before your children wake up even if it means rising at 4:30am to answer e-mails, approve designs and do research. Lessen your pain with a jumbo cup of coffee!

3. Have a routine.  Having breakfast with my boys and taking them to school  crucial aspects of my daily life. Most nights, I put my Blackberry down so I can eat with them, bathe them, read to them and snuggle before bedtime. After they’re sleeping, I can finish up my work.

Follow these tips — adapting them to your life and family — and you will be an uber Divalysscious Mom. Remember, making yourself a priority is not something to feel guilty about! Happy moms make happy kids.

Today’s guest author is Lyss Stern, Founder and CEO of Divalysscious Moms. For more, follow her on Facebook and Twitter.

Want To Win A Box of Godiva Chocolates: Read This

Posted on by Dr. Diane Sanford in Monday Musings, Press Release

To celebrate our almost first birthday which is October 9, we’re sponsoring a contest for our current and new subscribers. Because we want our October self-care contest/challenge to succeed, we’re asking that any subscriber get ten other friends, family, co-workers, etc. to join our blog, and we’ll enter you in a random weekly drawing for a box of Godiva chocolates for the month of September.

Winners will be chosen each Sunday and announced the following Monday. If you’ve never tasted Godiva chocolates, you’re in for a treat and if you have, you know how irresistable they are. For any new subscriber you recruit, have them leave your name in our comment box so you get credit.

We’re also asking you to give us your recommendations for favorite woman-or-mom-related blogs and websites, so we can include them in the October contest/self-care challenge. While we’ve discovered many sites we think are terrific and worthwhile, the web is too vast for anyone (except possibly a search engine expert) to know what’s out there. This will help ensure that we provide what you want. Likewise, as much as we enjoy social media, we can’t quit our day jobs for endless web surfing.

Now our self-care tip for the week. Focus on those experiences which strengthen rather than weaken you. I realized this again, when I was having a massage and started to freak out about an upcoming interview. Instead of scaring myself, I thought about situations I’d survived despite my fears and felt much calmer.

Sex Is Good for Our Brains-Who Knew???

Posted on by Dr. Diane Sanford in Monday Musings

According to a recent article by Dr. Oz, sex has some of the same stress-relieving benefits as exercise. In a recent animal study, they found that daily sexual experiences over two-weeks, reduced the release of cortisol, a major stress hormone, increased the brain’s ability to create and support new brain cells, and decreased anxietylike behavior.

Sound like good news? It would be except many women report losing their interest and desire for sex as they get older, and especially once they become moms. Likewise, negative messages they learned growing up may intensify their lack of libido.

For women, sexual desire derives from emotional as well as physical chemistry. Women want to feel an emotional connection with their partners, and when this is absent as often happens over time especially when raising a family, sexual interest diminishes. Midlife is a time when men and women often turn to affairs to  rekindle the spark they once felt with their original partner. However, once the honeymoon ends with the new partner, sexual desire may fade too.

The solution is that we must nourish our relationships with our current partners like we do our children, friends or anyone we love. Then emotional intimacy kindles desire and physical intimacy kindles an emotional connection. And the added benefit, sex is good for our brains. Who Knew???

I’m writing a new book about hormones, libido/desire and intimacy in women. If you have questions or would like to share your stories, please comment or e-mail realmomexperts@gmail.com.

When Self-Care is Not Enough; Ask for Help

Posted on by Dr. Diane Sanford in Monday Musings, Press Release

It has taken many years to learn how to take care of me; always putting other’s first while I drained the energy out of myself. Learning self-care began while battling postpartum depression (PPD) and anxiety 21 years ago.

PPD was out of my control, but I could seek help from others.  This was very difficult for someone who had never done it before. I gave my family and friends specific direction on how they could help me; i.e. I need an hour to myself, time to go for a walk, sit and talk with me, etc. On many occasions, I asked family and friends to watch my daughter while I attended doctor visits and counseling sessions.

Doctor visits were necessary and counseling sessions were invaluable; I learned tips on relieving anxiety and that my needs were important. I attended support groups for women with PPD.  I limited my conversations to those that were good listeners and supportive.  I stayed away from anxiety provoking situations.

I have learned that while self-care is important, sometimes you may need an extension of self-care. That’s when professional healthcare, professional counseling and support from others can help you to heal.

Linda Meyer is the Executive Director of Mother to Mother in St. Louis, MO.  Mother to Mother provides free telephone support, group support and resources to women experiencing emotional difficulties during pregnancy and postpartum. www.mothertomothersupport.org

Mother to Mother will be participating in the St. Louis Walk for Mental Health on Saturday, August 20 www.thewalk.org